It’s been just over a week since I went vegan. The learning curve is still pretty steep, and I have a lot to figure out (like I still don’t fully understand what tempeh is and how to use it).
Day one and two were great, with lots of new recipes saved to Pinterest and new vegan dishes cooked up by James. Then day three came along and detox began – with a non-stop headache and a permanent upset stomach. My body rebelled against me, wondering where the toxins were and why I was changing things up all of a sudden. That went on for three whole days of misery, but then – freedom. I woke up day five feeling a sense of something I couldn’t quite define. Could it be the stirrings of health? I think it might be, though that’s a completely new sensation, so I can’t be sure yet.
One feeling I am sure of is a small lift of Fibro Fog, the brain fog that comes with fibromyalgia. Fibro Fog is like a deep rolling fog bank that sets up residence in your brain – the kind that settles over everything and hides landscapes and waterways. The mist dampens your brain cells and makes you flat – mentally and emotionally. For times when you have to work and occasionally for life, you can roll it back, like a ray of sun punching through, but it always wins in the end. You know you have more to give, more to create, more to share, but you just don’t have the strength to access it. Over the years you give up - you leave it there, under the fog and just get by. You feel like an observer sitting on the bank of a large fog covered bay, just looking out over the water, knowing there’s beauty there, but not able to see it.
This week I felt something. I can only imagine it’s what people mean when they say 'my brain cells are firing’. It feels sort of like that – sparks or zaps in my brain which move into my body, like sun rays poking giant holes in the fog. It’s like a revelation. Could there be more of this? Will all the fog lift and leave me with a brain that’s awake? Will I reach new levels of thought and creativity I haven’t known for years? Will I feel alive instead of like a sleep walker? I think I might be starting to.
Thank you to everyone who has sent me encouraging messages and advice. It means the world to me! You can follow more of my vegan odyssey by subscribing to this blog on my Home page.